LATEST NEWS…SHARON VS DANNII ROUND TWO: Outspoken former X-Factor judge Sharon Osbourne has launched another scathing attack on her X-Factor co-star, the untalented Minogue sister (no need to elaborate). Mrs Osbourne previously said Dannii was only chosen as a judge because the show's creator Simon Cowell wanted to sleep with her. This time Sharon called Danni "f*cking useless." "She wasn't so much a dim bulb as a bulb in a power cut," Shaz added." You have to hand it to Sharon - she calls a spade a spade….NAOMI STRIKES AGAIN: Our favourite supermodel with anger management issues, Naomi Campbell, allegedly punched out a taxi driver in New York late last month. The driver claims the out-of-control model flew into a rage and began hitting him from the back seat leaving him with a black eye. He alleged that Naomi jumped from the vehicle and ran from the scene after he stopped the car to contact police. Taxi drivers all over New York now have a fear much greater than late-night knife muggings - God help them…WINO BACK WITH EX: Amy Winehouse has reunited with her druggie ex Blake Fielder-Civil. The pair were spotted pashing outside a London restaurant. The couple decided to reconcile their train-wreck relationship after Blake left her for another woman last year. Despite Blake making K-Fed look like the catch of the century, Wino probably hasn't been sober since she met him anyway. Well someone needs to fill Whitney and Bobby's shoes….TIGER'S GOT BALLS: Golf balls that is. Tiger Woods has resumed training and sources close to the family say the disgraced golfer will return to golf at the Tavistock Cup tournament on March 22. Meanwhile there has been no sign of the player's wronged wife Elin, although reports say she visited the man-whore - err sorry, her husband - in sex rehab. He probably should return to work since buying his wife's silence obviously comes at a very high price…LIFE IMITATES ART FOR TV STAR: 'Two and a Half Men' star John Cryer, who plays Charlie's super annoying brother Allen, isn't just hated by his onscreen ex wife. The whiny actor allegedly had a hit taken out on him by his actual ex wife (the aptly named) Sarah Trigger. A US court alleged that Trigger wanted to have the actor bumped off because he no longer agreed pay his $10 000-a-month child support for their two kids. Meanwhile his onscreen brother Charlie Sheen is in rehab after threatening his wife with a pocket knife. On the plus-side, there's enough drama in their lives to inspire a whole new series of 'Men'…UNDERBELLY - ANOTHER CONTROVERSY: It just wouldn't be Underbelly without controversy. The new series 'Underbelly: The Golden Years' about the Kings Cross underworld is again embroiled in controversy as a former Kings Cross police officer depicted in the show sues for defamation. The former officer, Wendy Gaye Hatfield, has demanded that the Supreme Court allow her to preview episodes before they go to air to ensure she has not been defamed. Hatfield believes that the plot suggests she had a sexual relationship with a notorious Kings Cross nightclub owner and was promoted in the NSW police force by providing sexual favours. While it all sounds juicy, Hatfield will try to stop parts of the show that paint her in a bad light from going to air. She probably doesn't realise she can cash in on the controversy just like Roberta Williams….MR HEIDI MONTAG IN HOSPITAL: Mrs plastic fantastic Heidi Montag's less famous other half, Spencer Pratt, was recently hospitalised needing stitches in his tongue. The injury to his tongue occurred in a bizarre incident where he implicated his new pet dog after he bit his own tongue leaving him unable to talk for several days. Unable to accept responsibility for being a clumsy fool, he blamed his poor (more intelligent) Pomeranian for his stupidity. Given the mindless rubbish that comes out of The Hills star's mouth, here's hoping he bites his tongue more often….JOHN HELPS JESS GET GUYS: John Mayer's recent comments about Jessica Simpson's talents as a lover are helping the blonde singer pull men. In an Oprah interview early this month, Jess said her phone had been ringing off the hook since John described her as "sexual napalm" to US Playboy. Meanwhile, no females will touch John Mayer with a ten foot pole after he described his junk as a 'white supremacist' and basically bagged all of his former girlfriends in the highest selling men's magazine in the world. Perhaps John also needs to have a freak accident involving Spencer Pratt's dog?...CHERYL COLE DUMPS HUSBAND: Another day, another sports star cheats on his wife. This time it's British soccer player Ashley Cole who has cheated on UK glamour girl and former Girls Aloud singer Cheryl Cole. The 26-year-old glamour found Shane Warne-style text messages on her husband's phone and after countless other infidelities on his part, finally decided to leave his ass. Cheryl is busy promoting her solo album '3 Words' which has been given rave reviews, so she probably isn't wasting much time crying over it. For the last time girls, do not date rockers, sports men or actors - unless you are totally against monogamy….
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BRAN NUE DAE (REVIEW)

In the words of the great Geoffrey Rush, who told me himself, "This movie rocks!" However, Bran Nue Dae, based on an Australian stage play of the same name, is more show tunes than rock and roll party.

Set in the scenic town of Broome, Western Australia, circa 1969, the story revolves around Willy, played by 15 year old newcomer Rocky MacKenzie. He's a proud Aboriginal who loves his hometown as well as the stunning girl Rosie (Jessica Mauboy). Reluctantly Rocky is sent to boarding school, mainly to satisfy his mother's desire for him to become a priest. When Willy stands up to the harsh punishment dished out by the cherry ripe loving headmaster, Father Benedictus (Geoffrey Rush), he decides to escape, fleeing the school with only one thought - get back to Broome.

Willy befriends the local Hobo, who dubiously promises him to escort him home. Known as Uncle Tadpole, they form an unlikely bond as they start their long journey across all kinds of terrain, all the while Father Benedictus is in hot pursuit. Along the way, an assortment of amusing characters pop up to lend a hand, including a pair of hippies in a spaced out Kombi van.

The celebration of indigenous identity is expressed in musical interludes. Every now and then, which is actually quite often, the cast break out into song and dance. The routines are inconsistent, while an unrelenting parade of stereotypes misuse much of the goodwill after a promising start. The basic attraction of the film is the picturesque landscapes - the standout camera work shows more of Australia than 'Australia did. The likable humour from all the characters is also a bonus to the script that makes them seem lovable. This even goes for the cranky Father Benedictus, who is portrayed with vigour by Geoffrey Rush, obviously having a wonderful time in the role.

Former junior boxer, Rocky (real name Phillip) MacKenzie is pretty good in the lead, showing honesty in his love for Rosie, but unable to summon the courage to tell her. Jessica Mauboy is an on-screen natural. Cameos include Missy Higgins (as one of the helping hippies who overstayed their welcome) and Magda Szubanski who adds a little comical seductive spice as Roadhouse Betty, to the otherwise tame PG rated film. Director Rachel Perkins moves things along at a reasonable pace - her second foray into Aboriginal musical territory after collaborating with singer/songwriter Paul Kelly on his film, 'One Night The Moon'.

Bran Nue Dae certainly has its moments and it ends on a high note but if you're not really inclined to enjoy musicals where the actors break into a song mid-sentence, give it a miss.

Shane A. Bassett

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