LATEST NEWS…SHARON VS DANNII ROUND TWO: Outspoken former X-Factor judge Sharon Osbourne has launched another scathing attack on her X-Factor co-star, the untalented Minogue sister (no need to elaborate). Mrs Osbourne previously said Dannii was only chosen as a judge because the show's creator Simon Cowell wanted to sleep with her. This time Sharon called Danni "f*cking useless." "She wasn't so much a dim bulb as a bulb in a power cut," Shaz added." You have to hand it to Sharon - she calls a spade a spade….NAOMI STRIKES AGAIN: Our favourite supermodel with anger management issues, Naomi Campbell, allegedly punched out a taxi driver in New York late last month. The driver claims the out-of-control model flew into a rage and began hitting him from the back seat leaving him with a black eye. He alleged that Naomi jumped from the vehicle and ran from the scene after he stopped the car to contact police. Taxi drivers all over New York now have a fear much greater than late-night knife muggings - God help them…WINO BACK WITH EX: Amy Winehouse has reunited with her druggie ex Blake Fielder-Civil. The pair were spotted pashing outside a London restaurant. The couple decided to reconcile their train-wreck relationship after Blake left her for another woman last year. Despite Blake making K-Fed look like the catch of the century, Wino probably hasn't been sober since she met him anyway. Well someone needs to fill Whitney and Bobby's shoes….TIGER'S GOT BALLS: Golf balls that is. Tiger Woods has resumed training and sources close to the family say the disgraced golfer will return to golf at the Tavistock Cup tournament on March 22. Meanwhile there has been no sign of the player's wronged wife Elin, although reports say she visited the man-whore - err sorry, her husband - in sex rehab. He probably should return to work since buying his wife's silence obviously comes at a very high price…LIFE IMITATES ART FOR TV STAR: 'Two and a Half Men' star John Cryer, who plays Charlie's super annoying brother Allen, isn't just hated by his onscreen ex wife. The whiny actor allegedly had a hit taken out on him by his actual ex wife (the aptly named) Sarah Trigger. A US court alleged that Trigger wanted to have the actor bumped off because he no longer agreed pay his $10 000-a-month child support for their two kids. Meanwhile his onscreen brother Charlie Sheen is in rehab after threatening his wife with a pocket knife. On the plus-side, there's enough drama in their lives to inspire a whole new series of 'Men'…UNDERBELLY - ANOTHER CONTROVERSY: It just wouldn't be Underbelly without controversy. The new series 'Underbelly: The Golden Years' about the Kings Cross underworld is again embroiled in controversy as a former Kings Cross police officer depicted in the show sues for defamation. The former officer, Wendy Gaye Hatfield, has demanded that the Supreme Court allow her to preview episodes before they go to air to ensure she has not been defamed. Hatfield believes that the plot suggests she had a sexual relationship with a notorious Kings Cross nightclub owner and was promoted in the NSW police force by providing sexual favours. While it all sounds juicy, Hatfield will try to stop parts of the show that paint her in a bad light from going to air. She probably doesn't realise she can cash in on the controversy just like Roberta Williams….MR HEIDI MONTAG IN HOSPITAL: Mrs plastic fantastic Heidi Montag's less famous other half, Spencer Pratt, was recently hospitalised needing stitches in his tongue. The injury to his tongue occurred in a bizarre incident where he implicated his new pet dog after he bit his own tongue leaving him unable to talk for several days. Unable to accept responsibility for being a clumsy fool, he blamed his poor (more intelligent) Pomeranian for his stupidity. Given the mindless rubbish that comes out of The Hills star's mouth, here's hoping he bites his tongue more often….JOHN HELPS JESS GET GUYS: John Mayer's recent comments about Jessica Simpson's talents as a lover are helping the blonde singer pull men. In an Oprah interview early this month, Jess said her phone had been ringing off the hook since John described her as "sexual napalm" to US Playboy. Meanwhile, no females will touch John Mayer with a ten foot pole after he described his junk as a 'white supremacist' and basically bagged all of his former girlfriends in the highest selling men's magazine in the world. Perhaps John also needs to have a freak accident involving Spencer Pratt's dog?...CHERYL COLE DUMPS HUSBAND: Another day, another sports star cheats on his wife. This time it's British soccer player Ashley Cole who has cheated on UK glamour girl and former Girls Aloud singer Cheryl Cole. The 26-year-old glamour found Shane Warne-style text messages on her husband's phone and after countless other infidelities on his part, finally decided to leave his ass. Cheryl is busy promoting her solo album '3 Words' which has been given rave reviews, so she probably isn't wasting much time crying over it. For the last time girls, do not date rockers, sports men or actors - unless you are totally against monogamy….
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LAW ABIDING CITIZEN (REVIEW)

What a surprise, literally! From the shattering opening minutes of this film, the drama unfolds at a rapid clip without once losing that upstanding, thrilling momentum.

The blood-soaked action begins when well-read scientist, Clyde Shelton (Gerard Butler) loses his family to a pair of psychotic home invaders. His life has fallen by the wayside all around him, however, a flicker of revenge breathes what little life he has left of existence. Ten years later, as one of the maniacs remains on death row, the other is released after negotiating a deal with a smarmy Philadelphia District Attorney, Nick Rice (Jamie Foxx). All of a sudden, the scheduled and much hyped execution of the convicted goes haywire, while his accomplice is found cut into 28 pieces at a random warehouse.

Shelton gleefully confesses personally to the D.A when fingers point towards his alleged involvement. There is a provision, however, before these confessions are made public, Rice must agree to fulfil a few bizarre requests first. Brushing it aside at first, Rice becomes vapid when more participants in the case turn up dead. It's all about payback.

After a little private investigation, Shelton may not be exactly who he says and more importantly, he may not stop the carnage until he brings down the whole administration down. A slick cat and mouse chase ensures, splashes of violence mask emotional depth, but the efficient thrills are effective enough to build tension. Director F. Gary Gray has not made a film so riveting since his early career bank heist drama, 'Set if Off'. Gruesome revenge by one man, 'Death Wish' vigilante style is nothing new, but the high tech manner and absorbing manner in which Shelton goes about his business, is simply impossible to ignore. This is where a torture warning should be apparent. Some of the tactics would not be out of context in a 'Saw' movie.

Perversion of justice is exploited in the plot - shady deals from lawyers are only the beginning of the corruption within the ranks of this system. A Scotsman, Gerard Butler ('300'), is a fine actor who can sing ('Phantom of the Opera') and do successful comedy ('The Ugly Truth'), is also completely suited to this bloodlust role of the vengeful Clyde Shelton. He seemed to gain support from the audience because he misses his wife & child, even after maiming his victims.

Oscar winner, Jamie Foxx is all nervous energy as the corrupt D.A. Rice, twitching as if he may be next on the hit-list without expressing physical fear. It's only when the tables are turned that Rice begins to emphasize before agreeing to sort out the matter, legally. Brooke Mills, unforgettable in the original 1988 version of 'Hairspray', has an all too condensed, but effective role as Clyde's doomed wife, while Viola Davis as the Mayor, provides a little female strength.

The eye rolling twist within the final stages may not be quite logical, but WOW! That was the word on everybody's lips as I left the cinema, still attempting to process what just happened. See it before the end is unveiled.

Shane A. Bassett

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